Writing your own wedding vows in New Zealand

Writing your own Wedding Vows in New Zealand

For most, writing your own wedding vows can be a daunting thought. You know what you feel in your heart but putting it into words, well that can be difficult. Your vows are an opportunity to truly express your love in a way we rarely do in everyday life. It’s something you can write down and can enjoy again later in life.

Here are a few points to consider when writing your vows;

1. Not all religious ceremonies allow you to express your personal vows. The Dream Maker encourages you to say your own vows, over and above the legally requirements.
2. The Dream Maker Celebrant services doesn’t offer any specific religious expression but I am open to any added religious song, prayer or reading if that is what you desire. You can also have a friend or family member to offer a blessing.
3. It is you, as a couple and your personal decision if you would like to write your vows together or separately. There are no rules. They can be whispered, spoken in your own tongue or even as a song or poem.
4. If either couple has trouble putting their feelings on paper they might like to ask their best man or maid of honour or a friend to help.
5. If writing isn’t you're thing use a Dictaphone or your phone to record what you want to say, then type it out in a way that can be easily read out loud.
6. I advise you to start with writing down 10 things you love about the person you are committing yourself too and then build the eloquent words around those points.
7. Worrying doesn’t solve anything. Make a cup of tea, or have a glass of your favorite dabble and schedule some time to brain storm or just for “me” time to sit and think about the commitment you are going to make, write down what they are and why they are important to express at this once in a life time opportunity..
8. Some people chose to say a poem, you can be creative. Maybe even get someone to write the poem or song for you? Or even use the words of a song you love which expresses exactly what you’re trying to say?
9. Chose a style, these can be found on google if you look and may inspire you? Think about who you are, are you romantic, a sentimentalist, comedian, is that appropriate for the occasion. Most things are if its truly you.
10. You want to really get a good balance of who you are and what you want your partner to feel as you speak those words to them. Love, Light humor, romance, appreciation is quay.
11. Remember there are no rules so it can be a long or short as you like, however don’t overdo it and spoil the message you are trying to convey.
12. Once you have started to write the vows, don’t be scared to find a quiet spot and practice them but don’t overdo it and lose the emotion of the moment.
13. I remind all my couples, when they speak their vows in front of their guests, to remember, your words are to each other, tears, pauses, laughs and silly moments are all allowed and enjoyed but it’s always the couples moment and to block everyone else out.
14. Once your vows are written send them to the Dream Maker to look after, so you don’t procrastinate. I will also laminate them and bring them to the ceremony; this gives you one less thing to worry about on the day and saves panic attack on losing them or them blowing away in the wind.

  

They can be emotional  

They can be funny

For further help and advise on your ceremony please contact Terri Everett, New Zealand's Award Winning Celebrant and Destination Event Manager. 

First two photos taken by Anthony Turner and woodland photo taken by Sandra Johnson.

Elopement for our wedding is an option

Tips on an elopement wedding in New Zealand!

New Zealand, South Island Tasman nelson Region.

"We should just elope!" is often shouted out in frustration when planning a traditional white wedding that throws up all sorts of unexpected issues that was never considered when accepting the proposal.

But how can you go through with that? with so much to consider, "what will your parents say? will your friends think you don't care?"

Given the escalating costs of a traditional white wedding, elopement is definitely an option to combine the ceremony with the honeymoon for the same budget. However before committing to elope you should carefully balance the pro's and con's of such a decision and I would suggest you include your closest and dearest friends and family in that discussion, so they understand why you are tilting towards excluding them from your event, or maybe they can join you too?

Considerations to getting married in New Zealand.

where ever you live in the world travelling to your wedding is a great risk. You are putting all your budget and trust into people you have never met before, so it is important to do your home work. Trip Adviser is a great way to find out how a certain provider has performed for other couples in a similar situation.

Fisherman's Island The Abel Tasman

Check what sort of credentials your provider has, have they got industry memberships like New Zealand Tourism orThe Celebrants Association or awards to show their performance and quality of service, under the terms of industry leaders such as Qualmark for example.

 

Photos by Soph Holt our Dream maker in-house photographer

Kaiteriteri & Te Pukatea Beach 

Janie Seddon Motueka

Choosing to elope could be a great disappointment to some, especially to the brides mother for example, however tradition does normally mean parents help out with the budget of a wedding, so you could softened the blow if you ask them to join you, for their trip of their life time, killing two birds with one stone.  They can enjoy being part of the wedding and then disappear to enjoy their own holiday while you enjoy your honeymoon. When you all return home you can exchange relevant stories.

Once settled back home, you can plan a party, where guests are asked to bring a plate to share to help keep costs down and the bride & Groom can wear their wedding attire again, with a rolling slide show or video of your event, bringing a true sense of atmosphere of your day into your home.  

We can arrange traditional New Zealand Flax flower bouquet and button hole and offer a service to pack up the flowers in a box and mail them back to your home address as a keep sake and to enjoy on your party night. 

 

You can also hold your speeches at the party, with so much to share and compare.

Your budget could be the deciding factor and I suggest you make up a dummy budget of costs to hold a traditional white wedding at home and compare it to the dummy costs of travelling to New Zealand for your wedding, remembering that this also is combined with your honeymoon.  Really think about what you need to invest in, dump the flash car for example to invest in a really good photographer, who can encapsulate your emotion with the beauty of the New Zealand back drop. Those pictures will undoubtedly be envied. When they see your beautiful photos and the delight on your face around the table, they will all wonder why they didn't do the same?

Photographer: Sandra Johnson

Mt Olympus

Reasons why you want to elope

Most couples who decide to look else where from their local parish have a need to make their commitment in privacy and without month of fuss and worry. The costs of running away for an intimate wedding ceremony with an option to blend their honeymoon in one can cost considerably less than dividing the two events, some couples have to opt out of a honeymoon to keep within their budget, yet this could be seen as important to a successful marriage as the ceremony itself and will never really be re-claimed if not enjoyed soon after the wedding.

The question of who to invite is so difficult and I often hear couples deliberating who and why certain people should be invited and often its "Because they invited us to theirs" This is a huge cost to consider when those people are not necessarily of such importance for a very personal day.  Eloping means you don't up-set these people for excluding them and can still invite them to a BYO party on your return.

Family discussions can become quite heated and common place around planning a wedding everyone has their pennies worth to add and this often shrouds the true reason for the event.  Taking this out of the picture, can save a lot of heart ache and possibly life long fude.

There is something old fashioned and romantic about running away to another country to be married but it often associates with trouble of some kind, a partner not accepted by the other family, an unexpected pregnancy, however this is no longer a social issue or war between two religions and of course the fast love and passion that can over shadow the reality of life.  I see more often these days older couples escaping to New Zealand for their big day. One couple recently didn't even tell their family and friends and booked me on April Fools Day, Of course they still didn't believe them until they posted a photograph of their celebration.

Awaroa Bay Abel Tasman

With the new laws for same sex LGBT legal marriage we find ourselves providing services for same sex couples who still can't be legally married in their home town and we pride ourselves on a welcoming philosophy, we also find couples who have too many restrictions in their home town and want the freedom to marry in a location without religious or council ties.  We've even had couples who did the paper work in their own country at the local registrar but continued to travel the miles and enjoy everything included in a wedding but the paper work on the day.

Cable Bay Nelson

Awaroa Inlet

What ever the reason that brings you to the final decision of an international wedding is ultimately your decision and can give you a great foundation for years of memories.

New Zealand is a smorgas board of choice but one place to really consider is the Nelson and Tasman region. It has so much to offer with three National Parks, which include mountain tops reaching out to the beautiful sandy beaches. There are so many unique locations but if your going to travel that many miles you will want the location to be special, maybe famous, like Lord of the Rings or Hobit film location or unique like a Maori heritage site?  However its not quite as strait forward as that, so make sure the providers you use have the necessary Department of Conservation documentation and permits.

Split Apple Rock

With the savings you make, you can budget for some really exciting extra activity and maybe a unique wedding accommodation like The Mudcastle if your bringing some family and friends, with an entire castle hire.

        

 Or maybe a place for two

Some people go to the extreme and combine their activity while saying their vows.

Kayaking

 

In New Zealand you're only required to be in the country for three days before the wedding ceremony date, with this simple registration system, it again adds to the hassel free planning, leaving you fresh and excited for your personal occasion.  The Dream Maker team can be contacted for further advice and planning support. We can be your feet on the ground and with our tried and tested contracted suppliers you can feel confident that your day will be perfect.

Terri Everett

Owner 

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events@thedreammaker.co.nz

0064 (0) 275268771

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The role of a New Zealand Wedding & Civil Union Celebrant

I am delighted to receive confirmation from Births Deaths and Marriages NZ that I have been approved as a NZ Celebrant for another term.




I can legally provide Marriages and Civil Unions but also provide Baby Naming, Memorials, MC, Two Family Bonding Ceremonies, Pet Ceremonies, Renewal of Vows, Distant Funerals/Memorials

An official role for a New Zealand Wedding and Civil Union Celebrant is:

• The marriage or civil union must be solemnized by an approved celebrant and before at least two witnesses.
• The formal identification of the parties named on the marriage or civil union licence. The celebrant must be satisfied the persons about to be joined are, in fact, those named on the licence.
• The marriage or civil union must be solemnized at a place described on the licence.
• The exchange of the marriage or civil union vows.
• The registration papers must be signed and witnessed in accordance with the Births, Deaths, Marriages and Relationships Registration Act 1995, and must be returned to the issuing Registrar within 10 calendar days.
• Celebrants must take all reasonable steps to ensure the marriage or civil union is registered with Births, Deaths and Marriages.
• Particular attention should be paid to pages 12 and 13 of A Guide to the Role of Celebrants in New Zealand which relates to the ceremony paperwork

 

The unofficial work I provide as a Celebrant is:
1/ All communication, advice and support required before, during and after your event
2 /Department of conservation permits
3/ knowledge and experience of tides and locations
4/ Advice and knowledge of mountain and beach locations
5/ years of experience
6/ a wide range of expertise in the industry and its members to combine into a whole celebration
7/ A beautiful native wood signing table and accessories
8/ Access to a wide range of hire items for styling

The Dream Maker is the only Celebrant and Event Manager to have been audited by New Zealand's Qualmark (Tourism's Stamp of quality service) which requires prof of safety, knowledge of industry and systems.

There is much more I can offer over and above the average Celebrant as an award winning Event Manager and chat is free, so feel free to call and discuss your event:  0064 (0)275268771 or fill in our inquiry form and we will get back to you as soon as we can.

In 2015 we were awarded as the most popular Wedding Celebrant and Wedding Planner - worldwide

See some of the groups The Dream Maker has association with. These show the effort we make to keep up to date with all the industry laws and expectations.

 

  

Baby Boomers' Its never too late for Love & Marriage

Baby Boomers' Its never too late for Love & Marriage

As a New Zealand Registered Celebrant I am often asked to officiate many unions by couples from all over the world who have found true love later in life or want to re-affirm their love to each other once they find themselves re-evaluating their lives after parenthood.  

Their stories of struggle and expectations in past relationships through an ever changing world brings them to a time where they can now, freely celebrate their love in a simple and memorable way.  

Meadowbanks Homestead, Awaroa

Abel Tasman National Park

Each wedding I officiate is special in its own right to the couple getting married but I truly love being part of the baby boomers celebration, where experience means these couples really know what the reality and legal implications involved are balanced with the love and affirmation they have for each other.  A marriage or re-affirming their vows is a statement to each other and their family and friends that what ever they have faced together or faced in the future its not alone; their is no doubt in each others trust or friendship and speaking the official vows and expressing their personal vows to each other is testimony to that. 

Having visited New Zealand with my new husband from Plymouth in the UK back in 1994 and returning to New Zealand 10 years ago to build a new life with my family, I never expected to be so close to home in our little town of Motueka. One of my most memorable couples I worked with was a bucket full of co-incidence and laughs,  I was astonished when a lively gentleman named Dave cycled up the drive and bounce into my office, shortly followed by a puffed out lady called Jane asking for a celebrant, only to discover the couple had also come from Plymouth but even more strangely had friends and places in common with me, In fact they knew our best man.

Dave's first words to me were; " I hear your a celebrant and I want to get married next Wednesday, can you do that? Of course I replied, we only need three days to create the paper work in New Zealand. When I went to mark the date on my calendar the next coincidence appeared, it was my 20th wedding anniversary.

Dave and Jane love only the simple things in life and that was exactly what they wanted for their celebration, so a stony beach wedding was planned at the Motueka Sand Spit with two good friends as witnesses. 

  

Their story unfolded and I soon realized I was part of a true life long love.  They first met at 5 year old in a tiny town on Dartmoor in the South of England, it was the first day of school and they stayed firm friends through out their school life until school ended and they both headed off in different directions getting married and having children but sadly both their marriages failed and almost 30 years after they first met Jane heard through the grapevine that Dave was single again and she felt compelled to write Dave a poem with entwined words indirectly asking to re-affirm their friendship. 

                                         First Day at School                 Leaving school

Their lives then took on a real adventure as friends for two years sailing the world and eventually becoming a couple.  After 20 years of courtship Dave popped the question and Jane said yes and on the 60th anniversary of the day they met (My 20th wedding anniversary) they become husband and wife. 

                                    We cycled one day, to the jeweler to say "please make these two rings into one"

We asked Gabriella "d'you know a good fella could wed us on t'beach in t'sun?"

"Hasten to see, my friend Terri, she'll fix you guys up a treat"

So back on our bikes, we cycled with might, to find her away down High street.

With a degree of elation, and some trepidation, we entered her office so posh!

She quickly agreed, despite the great speed, she'd do it...and not for much dosh.

A maid from Dartmoor! well what a score, and down to the shore we did tak'er.

She layed on some sun, we all had such fun...memories are made by t'DREAM MAKER :-)

Terri will surely fulfil all your dreams whether simple or elaborate, a nicer person to "do the honours" would be very hard to find. Halfway around the world, and by pure happenstance, we found a maid from Devon. Thank you for sharing our perfect day, & on your 20th wedding anniversary. How cool is that?

B.t.w........ for us, love is even lovlier the second time around"

Cheers Terri....Jane and Dave Hender.

Dave and Jane have obviously become friends of mine and I often see them chugging along Motueka High Street in their vintage Morris truck. Read more here: North & South Magazine

Another wonderful story was one of my first experiences in organizing a wedding in the Abel Tasman for another delightful couple Mike and Julie with a similar story of failed marriages but in another chance moment Julie met Mike in a bus stop on the way back from work.  In a news paper Julie was reading was a story on New Zealand where Julie had just returned from a trip there, New Zealand was a place Mike always wanted to visit which sparked a conversation, as the bus arrived Mike quickly wrote his telephone number on the paper in the hope Julie would call him to continue the stories he was so enjoying.  Cutting a long story short Julie and Mike got engaged and their choice of location was easy, it had to be New Zealand.

Once again I become good friends and kept in contact with Mike who has always been so kind in sharing their story.

Read more here page 46 & 47. One Smile Magazine

"Planned a Dream Wedding and got a Dream Wedding, Fantastic service,boat, Celebrant and the food was excellent. all topped of with memories that will last for ever" Regards Mike & Julie

With every celebration I am part of I feel blessed, couples arrive as strangers and leave as friends. I get to be part of one of the most important days in their lives in the most beautiful place in the world. The choices are massive, from mountain tops to glistening beaches, hop fields and orchards, lime caves and rose gardens, the list is endless, coupled with a delightful picnic and captured in film for ever.  Thank you for choosing The Dream Maker.

We've enjoyed lots of unique and beautiful moments with our more mature couples

For further information contact  The Dream Maker

events@thedreammaker.co.nz

0064 (0) 27 5268771

Terri Everett

Award Winning Celebrant and Event Manager

Specializing in boutique Weddings in National Parks 

from the mountain tops to the sea and every where in between

Abel Tasman

Kahurangi

Nelson Lakes

Farewell Spit

and other variations. 

Qualmark for quality

Enviro Bronze Award

Wedding Industry Association Awards

Doc Concessions